Good quality of us

› Forums › Personal Topics › Friend messages › Good quality of us

This topic contains 166 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Josh May 2, 2017 at 3:22 am.

  • Author
    Posts
  • March 14, 2017 at 7:51 am #1508

    Josh

    U should get sleep when u are tired and feel ready.

  • March 14, 2017 at 2:51 pm #1509

    Josh

    There is a physical anthropology dimension of human interaction that should play a role in mutual respect. People should be allowed to have their own diarys and fantasies about what they hope for, without taking heat. Lobbying someone else about that in conversation is different…that’s an overt act that impacts the other person. So it’s okay to say that you find it disagreeable and don’t want it to continue, and they should respect your space in that way.

    • March 14, 2017 at 3:36 pm #1512

      Josh

      It’s subjective, but not difficult, to categorize something as being deliberately brought to your attention or not/accidentally. I keep advocating for that distinction and saying that u should make peace with the diaries u actually notice, while asking for respect not to get drawn into fantasy debates/discussions. Others should be able to be peaceful with that too. On a practical level, all should recognize that pulling together and focusing on freedom is the best course for our welfare, individually and collectively.

      • March 14, 2017 at 3:43 pm #1513

        Josh

        That applies in reverse too. It’s symmetrical, lime most moral principles.

  • March 14, 2017 at 4:56 pm #1517

    Josh

    We “started” with a very asymmetric relationship. U were allowed to know about me and watch me for years. I was unknowing. We couldn’t talk or meet. Once we began, slowly, to communicate, cryptically, with misunderstandings, it took a long time to ease that asymmetry. I understand now, some of the ways, in which u worried that I would hurt u a lot without having any inkling of why or what I was doing wrong (or not doing right).

    It’s right for us NOW to embrace the positives in that…glass half full…we’re proud of the way that we kept going, to get us past that tricky starting point…to be close now, without being ignorant. I ask u to celebrate Anna for that and not be remorseful.

  • March 14, 2017 at 8:10 pm #1518

    Josh

    I couldn’t work out what u were recently writing about. Was it someone look at your old LCs from before the times we met to see if I was telling the truth about that?

  • March 14, 2017 at 9:07 pm #1525

    Josh

    My intuition says that u are happier with role play.

  • March 14, 2017 at 11:26 pm #1526

    Josh

    An example of a topic for eChirp?

  • March 15, 2017 at 1:23 am #1527

    Josh

    Got it.

    One thing that’s different, coming to talk with u on Twitter, with interference, is that it takes focus to catch the content…that’s a different feeling than kicking back.

  • March 15, 2017 at 11:52 pm #1536

    Josh

    The Ward Churchill is just sitting there?

    • March 16, 2017 at 3:39 am #1546

      Josh

      I didn’t/don’t see that a negative critical reading of the Trudeau remark would turn up high in the search ranking. I don’t get that focus.

  • March 16, 2017 at 3:29 am #1545

    Josh

    We can argue with good humor, without anger. We should remember that trust is really important to us, and why we trust each other.

  • March 16, 2017 at 10:19 am #1547

    Josh

    Have to try the fresh fish and chips for breakfast?

    • March 16, 2017 at 11:33 am #1548

      Josh

      Do u have any idea what level authorized it? Was it given to u like that to edit, or did u do that by yourself to draw attention? Im thinking u can’t do that by yourself, nowadays.

  • March 16, 2017 at 1:43 pm #1549

    Josh

    That does look Lake Johanna!

  • March 16, 2017 at 11:47 pm #1555

    Josh

    U always come with good energy for me, so I want to keep it going. Hold u close & tell u I like it like that, being most real…we beat the odds, being more real together than apart.

  • March 17, 2017 at 9:49 am #1557

    Josh

    Why feeling low today?

    • March 17, 2017 at 9:53 am #1558

      Josh

      Repeating things I’ve said before – You should make a judgment about each piece of info or clue that reaches you: to what extent is this a designer piece of info, probably disinfo, that is 100% controlled and manipulated by Spook captors who wish me ill and ignorance? You don’t always know for certain, so you can put a probability on it. But the default probability is close to 100%. In that situation, where you know you are being manipulated, doing the exact opposite of what they want is a good strategy.

      • March 17, 2017 at 9:58 am #1559

        Josh

        In my case, I feel like I tried in July-Oct 2013 to see if there was going to be any negotiation, decency or quarter, and the answer was a huge “NO FUCKING WAY!” There was only more stings and more attempts on my life. That was a useful investigation. Doing that allowed me to see there were no possibilities there, and it would only be war. That was the correct conclusion about the given reality. I’ve seen endless support for that conclusion since and no support for doubting it. Even Spook has often agreed. Perhaps Spook would claim that active opposition got my Mother killed, but I certainly had no warning about that. I think it was just a Spook strategy (though it misfired).

  • March 17, 2017 at 10:54 am #1561

    Josh

    Other female friends u know, are generally like u in the sense of wanting love, connection, sex, and relationships. It’s probably true that the special love u trust is just a little bit more important to u, relative to those other things. And that shouldn’t be enough difference to make u feel isolated or completely misunderstood. U have to get tight with a love that sticks. Friends should understand how u come by that naturally, & from formative experience. Let’s keep it as a strength for us.

  • March 17, 2017 at 8:20 pm #1564

    Josh

    It’s Friday night, u are cute, and Delhi is way North of Madras, though still pretty warm in March.

  • March 18, 2017 at 2:54 am #1567

    Josh

    I’m drinking too much coffee…& wunph is kind of sped up tonight. Some kind of transference?

  • March 18, 2017 at 3:02 am #1568

    Josh

    I haven’t been working at flux minimizing a lot/enough over the past few days. There were a few reasons for that…but it doesn’t feel that great, sitting here.

  • March 18, 2017 at 3:08 am #1569

    Josh

    Were you able to hear any of that Truthdig interview? Scheer was talking about how, in the past, there had been CIA agents in every major newsroom internationally who could push or kill stories. I haven’t hear anyone assert that before. I don’t think it is that guys book, but I will check out the book.

  • March 18, 2017 at 3:49 am #1572

    Josh

    I should lay down, unspin, think of u. Wish u could come with me, and we could have one normal, okay feeling day. Once a year or something. I’m sorry that I can’t settle u. I know Friday is a thing in your heart. I do feel really together with u. More so, all the time. U have done a lot to help me find the people on the lists, besides editing them. And helped me to find interesting articles/tweets/etc. The time spent reading/researching was useful too. We can keep trying every day to better in most of the ways that we are able.

    • March 18, 2017 at 3:55 am #1573

      Josh

      U felt bad that I was reviewing witnesses to 9/11 things who had been killed? It’s a lot more recent that JFK witnesses being killed, but almost identical in practice. That’s really who Spook is. An ugly, no values group of criminal scumbags. Killing is the main thing they understand and one their core competencies. You do something a lot and you get good at it. Not much anyone can do except minimize the easy opportunities and make a lot of noise. I feel that the noise is the most important thing. The FBI isn’t used to killing people that are writing “The FBI is working to kill me once a week, or so, and describing it.” That kind of defeats the purpose of murder to shut someone up.

  • March 18, 2017 at 1:10 pm #1574

    Josh

    U my Ulysees (sic).

  • March 19, 2017 at 3:25 am #1590

    Josh

    Shine in crazy diamond. That’s what u meant.

  • March 19, 2017 at 8:00 pm #1593

    Josh

    Tatoo you. Who are the devolved nation? The US?

  • March 19, 2017 at 9:11 pm #1594

    Josh

    Imaging us together, my picture never includes sadness or regrets for either of us. Sometimes those things come from somewhere else or get remembered, and we quickly erase them. When I joked about us sitting on the same side of the table, it wasn’t really a joke. I knew felt u as sexy without knowing any details. The part about our interaction and intimacy stayed true, while other misconceptions got replaced. For u, I’m a perfect listener. So that makes me a beast.

  • March 20, 2017 at 12:00 am #1595

    Josh

    Cute, smart bacon

    appeared next to Google weirdness.

    Google weirdness

    Is it a pact/challenge?

  • March 20, 2017 at 12:08 am #1596

    Josh

    I saw this tweet

    and I thought of Albert Collins doing his voices:

    “I’ve got a monopoly exemption.”

    “Oh, I’ve got a monopoly exemption too!”

  • March 20, 2017 at 12:43 am #1597

    Josh

    That’s my Oleg Cassini.

    • March 20, 2017 at 12:50 am #1598

      Josh

      I wasn’t actually sure if u meant that I was putting time into silly games. I’m not sure what the smartest game is. Since whatever I try to do, they plan to put in big effort to stop, it kind of helps to be meandering in some ways. That throws their planning off.

  • March 20, 2017 at 3:58 am #1599

    Josh

    Favorite…love chick.
    Favorite partner

  • March 20, 2017 at 4:05 am #1600

    Josh

    U know what I mean.

    • March 20, 2017 at 4:17 am #1601

      Josh

      U like making me, keeping me happy, and one part of that helping me to be a good Dad.

  • March 20, 2017 at 5:58 am #1602

    Josh

    Going to lay down for a bit and dream about your wise animal nature.

  • March 20, 2017 at 4:59 pm #1603

    Josh

    Fewer, larger, more white than black. Something half-way in between would be optimal.

  • March 20, 2017 at 5:20 pm #1604

    Josh

    Archaeology for your Mom is complicated by a few factors: 1) there were a lot more ghost editors back then than we originally realized 2) ghost editors started outside of Spook, so we don’t know when they became mostly all Spook, 3) MI6 and CIA were extremely deceitful, inside and outside.

    I think it’s possible that your Mom was recruited by MI6 or even grew up MI6 and didn’t tell you. Not sure about that, but it’s possible. It’s possible that her exile to Bent Larsen was a kind of punishment for hetero affairs in England.

    Those are just ideas, I was kicking around in my head.

    • March 20, 2017 at 5:57 pm #1605

      Josh

      I would try to go back in time to ask u, Flor, and Chatu, “which were the authors/songwriters that your Mom told you she had edited?”, and which were ones where you looked for yourselves, found LCs, and jumped to the conclusion that your Mom was involved because of a mistaken belief about the origins of LC editing and how widely it spread. I have the most confidence in Vonnegut and that Chicago vine because of the biographical parallels, so I could look there with a focus on style.

  • March 20, 2017 at 11:08 pm #1606

    Josh

    For lobster. Or clams?

  • March 21, 2017 at 8:57 am #1612

    Josh

    I can’t see what u are upset about through the fake news.

  • March 21, 2017 at 9:00 am #1613

    Josh

    U are upset about being uniquely important??

  • March 21, 2017 at 9:03 am #1614

    Josh

    Over time, I am getting more selective with the lists. New things are added, and some drop off.

  • March 21, 2017 at 9:09 am #1615

    Josh

    I have a divergent belief that the CIA is lying all the time and manipulating a tremendous number of current events? Because I’ve studied that and seen the evidence, and when I make predictions based on that view they come true.

  • March 21, 2017 at 9:16 am #1616

    Josh

    CIA and FBI are part of a cult that revels in the idea that truth is simply enough clump of dirt that can be bullied away like anything else. They approach topics and people with the idea that they are going to show them that. There is no art to it actually. It’s about strength of resources and lack of all social inhibitions.

    • March 21, 2017 at 9:40 am #1619

      Josh

      I’m sure I could learn a lot by being a fly on the wall in the inner sanctums. Seeing what people say about all sorts of scheming.

  • March 21, 2017 at 9:21 am #1617

    Josh

    Just because?

  • March 21, 2017 at 9:34 am #1618

    Josh

    I like being responsible for u…as much as I can be…like this.

  • March 21, 2017 at 9:47 am #1620

    Josh

    U all have a lot of healing to do. If u get to be little & cute with me, then u won’t miss be anyone else’s little sister…not too much anyway.

  • March 21, 2017 at 4:54 pm #1621

    Josh

    Some days, lots of days, u are the strongest. Yet u gain enlightenment from days when u feel weak, because then u know how that is, and how u think about fixing it. I’m with u all those days…now…helping u to be all smart and shiny.

  • March 21, 2017 at 4:59 pm #1622

    Josh

    That’s some crazy hand jive.

  • March 21, 2017 at 6:16 pm #1623

    Josh

    She really was addicted to lying, so no specific story could be believed. But I got your idea for us 🙂

  • March 22, 2017 at 4:36 am #1635

    Josh

    See, u are unique and perfect.

  • March 22, 2017 at 4:37 am #1636

    Josh

    Before Blum, there was Spiderman.

  • March 22, 2017 at 4:48 am #1637

    Josh

    I was the only one working in this scenario??

  • March 22, 2017 at 4:56 am #1638

    Josh

    The only thing I’ve ever advocated for communalizing was the effort to get u out of prison. Couldn’t believe u would want to stay. That was true. U didn’t. U also didn’t want to watch anyone else die. But u could have explained that.

  • March 22, 2017 at 5:03 am #1639

    Josh

    We can split our attention between looking for signs of progress and focusing on things that we can control.

  • March 22, 2017 at 11:53 am #1642

    Josh

    I do feel like everything about u is special. I can’t match that, so I just try to stay busy :)/2

    I have outlets/writers I back and topics: CIA and FBI wrongdoing, Security State media influence, human trafficking, defense corruption/spending/war, and a few others. I’m pretty good about stick about staying in those boundaries.

    • March 22, 2017 at 11:59 am #1643

      Josh

      Most of the MSM doesn’t like Trump, politically or personaly, even if left to their own devices. So when there Deep State owners are also interested in damaging Trump then it’s open season, bash Trump, all the time. This doesn’t really help or hurt us any more than other noise in the news. It generates some extra examples of Deep State manipulation being quickly touted, but Trump supporters are more interested in that than Trump bashers. The bashing or not doesn’t matter to us. It’s only the Spook content that matters.

      • March 22, 2017 at 12:02 pm #1644

        Josh

        Look at Robert Steele. We are not directly communicating, but he is on a kind of parallel political mission – for a lot longer than me (or you, consciously). He had a Marine and Spook background and not an academic background, but he is trying to see what kind of approaches can help the overall mission.

        • March 22, 2017 at 12:08 pm #1645

          Josh

          CIA & FBI use a lot of tactics to isolate political, informational opponents, make them feel alone, and dominate public discourse with their lies, propaganda, and shills. It helps critics a lot to see a larger colation and what they are saying and experiencing.

  • March 22, 2017 at 10:45 pm #1656

    Josh

    YMCA, YM is sweet on validating A…

  • March 22, 2017 at 10:54 pm #1657

    Josh

    I place a lot of value on making sure that feelings always match words. In love, that’s what I wish for. U are like that too.

  • March 22, 2017 at 11:58 pm #1658

    Josh

    Tweet I complained about was a guy. What did u notice about “Muslim problem”?

  • March 23, 2017 at 12:05 am #1659

    Josh

    Mattis and Ernst go out in the noonday sun.

  • March 23, 2017 at 3:48 am #1660

    Josh

    That editor spoke as if she was familiar, but I couldn’t map the style to anyone in particular.

  • March 23, 2017 at 7:28 am #1664

    Josh

    Thanks for writing as my gurl. I value us a lot. Being SUPER close to u is best.

  • March 23, 2017 at 7:33 am #1665

    Josh

    Don’t call me “al Senoor”?

  • March 23, 2017 at 4:39 pm #1667

    Josh

    A lot of people are moderately important to u in some ways. People, in general are important to have in one’s life. It’s a good thing to make the best of what is available.

    I wrote an email to FBI/CIA, early on, explaining the context of how/why I had originally mentioned Steve’s housemate and why, I mentioned it in the original context in a way that sounded more significant than it was…trying to be sociable. I had no reason to attach any special significance to that. I had no knowledge of how Emma had gotten a wrong story out of that. So later on, when we were trying to get everyone on the same page, I tried to defuse it by only half setting her straight. Since I wrote the email explicitly about the misunderstanding in 2013, it’s fine for you to explain it to her.

    • March 23, 2017 at 4:47 pm #1668

      Josh

      The origin point of the story was the she was a bi “ag” who I really connected with, but nothing really happened because we were both in other relationships, her with a woman. But I felt confident that this was only circumstantial. So I tried to convey that sense, which seemed appropriate and relevant at that early time, given what u had told me up to that point.

  • March 23, 2017 at 6:08 pm #1669

    Josh

    Love our waking times…

  • March 23, 2017 at 6:25 pm #1670

    Josh

    U don’t like to remember the time when u didn’t want to talk to me and u wouldn’t talk to me. But it would help for u to remember enough to describe it that way.

    • March 23, 2017 at 6:29 pm #1671

      Josh

      If u remember as me walking away, or doing something wrong, or doing anything that was insensitive or trying to “show u” – none of those were true. I could only work with the view of the world that I had.

      • March 23, 2017 at 6:34 pm #1672

        Josh

        U were not teaching me or explaining anything at that time. For those reasons, and everything else, u can’t describe your position then as committed or narrowly focused on only us.

        • March 23, 2017 at 6:36 pm #1673

          Josh

          But I know u well enough now, and how to read what u were writing in the past, to see that u truly did want those things. Still, it’s helpful to u now to see the difference between privately wanting that and allowing me to know that.

  • March 23, 2017 at 6:48 pm #1674

    Josh

    I’m not that strong on the emotional side of anniversaries. At lots of random times I do think about the many, many occasions where u saw things from my POV and were trying to help me & be sweet to me & how u wouldn’t give that up. And I see how that is a part of u, for a long, long time, and today. In that way, I’m always in the spirit of an anniversary.

    • March 23, 2017 at 6:52 pm #1675

      Josh

      No, I don’t handicap that for CIA crime. I want u free and having fun. Want the CIA to end, and the US govt to stop slaving, murdering all sorts of people, and erasing the reality from human history.

  • March 23, 2017 at 9:21 pm #1678

    Josh

    Only play Tetris for that stuff that matters.

    I always like rooting for u.

  • March 23, 2017 at 11:35 pm #1680

    Josh

    The partner who went to Australia was the other woman. I didn’t get a sense of how she felt about guys, though she had a generally adventurous personality.

    My wunph is special, one of a kind. Some day, lot of lovin later, the next generation will be in focus.

  • March 24, 2017 at 5:45 am #1685

    Josh

    Sculpting the ace of hearts for matching temples books.

  • March 24, 2017 at 5:47 am #1686

    Josh

    I did one of your abbreviations on purpose.

  • March 24, 2017 at 5:53 am #1687

    Josh

    U got the honeymoon picked out already?

    https://www.ihg.com/holidayinnexpress/hotels/us/en/portage/pgein/hoteldetail

  • March 24, 2017 at 6:39 pm #1688

    Josh

    I don’t waste time considering scams from scammers. It’s easy to point out why it’s a scam and move on.

    • March 24, 2017 at 6:44 pm #1689

      Josh

      I can imagine being in a prison, where I am always hungry. Very little food is provided, and what is available is terrible. As part of the brainwashing program, a guard comes by every day and talks some nonsense. They say “How would you feel about having this great feast…all you have to do is go shoot a gun at the person we tell you to shoot at.” The point is to get you to think about doing what they say and distracted from your own moorings. There isn’t going to be any great feast, so you might as well not think about shooting anyone either, and ignore the person talking.

  • March 24, 2017 at 7:36 pm #1690

    Josh

    We are trying to help more people see the reality that we are seeing – which is supported by actual facts and stories that MSM ignores by policy. You don’t have a microphone. Hopefully the step of generating a lot of relevant content outside of the MSM helps MSM reporters to see it and incorporate it in various ways. Each little thing u do in editing, or IT, or astroturf is tiny, but u do so many things per day that the effect can be big in a cumulative way. The things u do can make it harder or easier for others to help.

  • March 24, 2017 at 8:22 pm #1691

    Josh

    Good rabbits.

    • March 24, 2017 at 8:49 pm #1693

      Josh

      I like the idea of Donnie Darko having a personal connection to us. It’s a great movie & a really successful example of art working well while being closely connected to an unfiltered subconscious mind. The way it came true in the real world – u got me to see without being able to talk – makes it that much better.

  • March 24, 2017 at 8:32 pm #1692

    Josh

    U shouldn’t connect the laws or politics of “illegal aliens” to your situation in any real way. Internally, the FBI tells lies on thin pretexts, so it’s conceivable that something somewhere was based on such a claim. But it isn’t really relevant to our struggle on a personal level.

  • March 24, 2017 at 9:12 pm #1695

    Josh

    U have a little tiny spot of bad feeling left that wants to talk about why I wasn’t taking care of u after u broke up with me without explanation and wouldn’t talk about it even when I begged u too? One part of the context is that u had seemed to tell me that I u had been with someone I didn’t know to exist and switched out of that to someone else I didn’t know existed. That caused a lot of doubts about what was going on, on various levels. It wasn’t the right picture, but that was the effect of what u presented to me at the time.

    • March 24, 2017 at 9:19 pm #1696

      Josh

      Looking back, I feel that Babes and Flor both put feeling and effort into helping our adventure to keep going. Nine months later, Emma did too. None of them could see everything that was going on in your head or heart, but that was their desire. I feel that they were friends to both of us.

      • March 24, 2017 at 10:27 pm #1697

        Josh

        I’m trying to help u tonight, with something u keep coming back to. The point is that if u can remember it *the true way*, it won’t feel like I let u down or turned away from protecting u.

        • March 25, 2017 at 12:11 am #1698

          Josh

          In most situations, things can always get worse. U gave in to being prison, and then gave up on teaching me, and then felt like it was logical to give up all together. Except that felt awful and u couldn’t explain. Eventually, the part that u knew about got explained, and then the part u didn’t know about got explained as well. I’m probably lucky to be alive, but I see that it is pointless to make concessions to evil Spook because evil Spook only kills targets, never compromises. Understanding that much is a step forward.

          • March 25, 2017 at 3:15 am #1703

            Josh

            How many weeks of no explanation, not getting along, u dating someone else do u figure I should have allowed as a “time out” be sensitive? Thinking back, the question doesn’t make any literal sense because a “time out” wasn’t mentioned or inferrable by me. It felt like only a goodbye. U keep saying now that it was a time-out in your mind, or just u feeling bad for some indefinite length of time. I believe the second is true. But how was I supposed to guess that?

  • March 25, 2017 at 1:50 am #1699

    Josh

    I don’t mean to be dallying. When u feel upset, that affects me too. Flux affects me. The video was worthwhile. The other links I got were worthwhile. Comment counts based on replies to Spook are not useful to measure anything. Moving along…

    • March 25, 2017 at 1:53 am #1700

      Josh

      The story about the one media guy who tried to cover the MLK Civil Trial getting fired and becoming a Targeted Individual was interesting too.

  • March 25, 2017 at 2:52 am #1701

    Josh

    Who do you see as a good prospect, in practical terms?

  • March 25, 2017 at 2:59 am #1702

    Josh

    The group of people I list as IndyNews are enough to staff the relevant part of several newspapers, and they are better reporters and writers than the mainstream newspapers. The main problem is that their audience is a lot smaller and fragmented. I don’t have any quick way to fix that. But I think there is hope for syndication and percolation. CIA control prevents most percolation…that’s always been the case. I hope the new synergy & interactivity of the Internet can change that. in some way. People “on the Internet” can rush to a free spot in a hurry if the buzz catches on.

    • March 25, 2017 at 7:16 am #1705

      Josh

      Listening to a recently recorded interview with P.D. Scott, I felt that he had read some of the things I wrote. He sounds like he is reading all the time, so probably doesn’t remember where misc comments were encountered, but he probably read the comments at WhoWhatWhy where he publishes, and maybe some other places.

  • March 25, 2017 at 3:17 am #1704

    Josh

    Conceptually, I can make different lists of corruption fighters. But how do I contact them and get them interested in my situation or your situation?

  • March 25, 2017 at 7:26 am #1706

    Josh

    These anti-dementia exercises that you give me are good. I feel that picture to word or tune to word has always been a relative weak point for me – I mean, my memory has always been a lot better in other ways than that one. But I try. Sometimes a picture looks like a cross of 4 different people and I can only place 2 or 3 of them in context, and recall 1 or 2 specific names. “Stephanie” I recall, but she was only 4th most similar to the picture. Jessica Lustig I recall, and she was 2nd. Laurie Blum’s best friend was third, but I can’t remember her name. And 1st is someone I have less connection to, but I remember what she looked like – some kind of student context.

  • March 25, 2017 at 11:50 am #1707

    Josh

    I tried, last night, to focus on what u wanted to talk about. U brought up old themes that still bothered u. So that’s what we talked about. Was it a bad choice or not helpful? I can’t say. I know it wasn’t your favorite. But sometimes u have to go where your mind takes u.

    Anti-war, Anti-defense spending, Deep State, Awareness of Rogue CIA, Awareness of human trafficking, Awareness of FBI not being cops fighting crime, Awareness of politician nonsense, Awareness of problems with MSM telling lies and propaganda and history of CIA influence…these things are all trending. What we have done has something to do with that. So that’s better no results.

  • March 25, 2017 at 12:07 pm #1708

    Josh

    U worry that I turn off to u, but I never do. U felt bad about a time, long ago, when u shut me off for a long time. I felt really bad then, and didn’t understand the why of anything. Sometimes now, u feel bad thinking back then for different reasons,,,u shouldn’t say I did this or that because of not remembering.

  • March 25, 2017 at 12:26 pm #1709

    Josh

    U haven’t told me what u have been anxious/upset about? U don’t feel like I’m working right for survival?

  • March 25, 2017 at 12:29 pm #1710

    Josh

    How should talk differently or around a topic that u keep bringing up on a semi-regular basis??

  • March 25, 2017 at 5:30 pm #1711

    Josh

    Do you remember editing this?

    It comes from Robert Parry’s latest article on US psyops

  • March 25, 2017 at 5:54 pm #1712

    Josh

    I wasn’t trying to argue or to get u to focus on things u don’t like to remember despite u bringing them up all of the time. No. I was trying to get u to see that there wasn’t really any time when I turned away from u or wasn’t someone u could trust. There was a time when u walked away & wouldn’t explain to me. Then we kept quarreling about that lack of communication and lack of explanation until the explanation emerged. Then we got back together, more or less. That u walked away or that we quarreled doesn’t change the reality that I wanted to be close to u and didn’t let u down.

  • March 25, 2017 at 6:01 pm #1713

    Josh

    When u look at it that way, the fact that u walked away at one point, and the fact that we both wanted to get back together says that it wasn’t an arbitrary thing about limited opportunities. Thinking back, u can realize that u helped to prove that. In a way, u had a test.

  • March 25, 2017 at 6:10 pm #1714

    Josh

    Why are u feeling vulnerable today/yesterday to the point of major down distraction? What is real today/yesterday that makes u feel that way?

  • March 25, 2017 at 6:21 pm #1715

    Josh

    My review of the evidence I’ve seen says that the FBI/CIA often kill people for much less reason than they have to kill me, but they only risk making it appear to be a homicide when there is a timing factor involved that makes it valuable to kill quickly. They have a lot of sneaky spy ways to make murders not look like homicides, but talking about it all the time raises the bar for that. I am trying to get you all out of prison and skip the ‘me dying’ part. It’s also important for other people to see how evil they are. If anything in the world deserves the label evil, it is those secret mass murderers, who kill for fun, money, and power.

  • March 25, 2017 at 9:15 pm #1716

    Josh

    CNN piece – difficult to say who the editor is, but it sounds kind of like a Denver person, not at the very bottom tier; maybe one rung up.

    • March 25, 2017 at 9:20 pm #1717

      Josh

      If u read what she says, and I am in the right general ballpark about her affiliation, then she is describing conversations with K, about Zuzu, based on spying on the Venus house, and confirming that the CIA ordered a hit based on that type of partial knowledge – I didn’t know it was US, but I knew some story about Zuzu sexuality while still at Venus.

  • March 25, 2017 at 9:40 pm #1718

    Josh

    I wear the Winter coat because it helps shield me. Without active chem marker, the targeting works on feed back of where water is responding to the signal. So if I wear the coat, it mostly targets me below the waist. That is helpful for working, but u don’t like it much.

  • March 25, 2017 at 11:31 pm #1723

    Josh

    This is u after u romped to victory in your Quidditch match?

    • March 25, 2017 at 11:46 pm #1724

      Josh

      The picture isn’t a true match, but the robes, and the aggressive, sporty stance and the long brown hair led me to map Harry Potter to Sharon Shopa from Jr. High School as athletic, popular, confident girl kind of symbol.

  • March 26, 2017 at 12:12 am #1725

    Josh

    It’s impossible for me to know your Mom. But based on the bits that I do know, I think she believed in hiding disturbing truths from children, and I doubt that she would have any difficulty feeling lovely sentiments about cute giraffes.

  • March 26, 2017 at 6:10 am #1728

    Josh

    It was a kind of sad when River Phoenix died in the aftermath of Stand by Me. So I do want all my close friends to stay together. We are a lot closer than those movie characters who were just being formed as people.

  • March 27, 2017 at 2:04 pm #1735

    Josh

    We should try had not to get distracted by trolls.

  • March 27, 2017 at 2:14 pm #1736

    Josh

    I started wondering about the idea of Straight Dope as in French Connection – uncut – and whether your Mom thought about that as an analogy.

  • March 28, 2017 at 2:43 am #1738

    Josh

    When I was going through the divorce settlement, there was a court meeting in Mar/Apr 2012 that decided all the major details, but K’s lawyers didn’t send e-mail related to finalizing until Aug. 2012. I didn’t have any perception at the time that the details were a black hole to u or particularly relevant to anything u would feel emotion about. U didn’t ask, so far as I could tell. I thought it was part of the same story I described to u.

    • March 28, 2017 at 3:17 am #1739

      Josh

      My recollection was that I did explain, at that time, about how getting mortgage approved wasn’t going to work out and that I bought a house for cash, feeling like it was a good option, considering that constraint. After the EMF attacks started, I regretted not buying the previous house I looked at which had all the land around it. But it was a lot less practical – needed a lot of renovation and snow ploughing/yard work would have been much bigger time/money investments. Am I misremembering about communicating that gist?

      • March 28, 2017 at 3:24 am #1740

        Josh

        We split expenses through the end of April 2012 and income through the end of 2011. I tried to be responsible about taking care of the house things until I moved out. That was kind of part of my role. It was K’s decision to keep the property for a while and rent it. I had no say in that. But I got credit for my half of the equity at appraised value, so she was doing me a favor by taking responsibility for what became of the property. She hoped to sell at a higher price, but it’s still work required for rental, selling, whatever. In her case, she would mostly pay other people.

  • March 29, 2017 at 4:06 am #1743

    Josh

    Gardening at the University of Calabar must be a good metaphor for something…

    I’m Trying to decide whether to lay down for 2 hours or stay up.

    • March 29, 2017 at 4:42 am #1744

      Josh

      I’m getting a sense that the words in the headline matter a lot for driving traffic at the sites which cycle through a lot of articles from various sources. That’s unsurprising…but articles with juicy headline and lukewarm content run more than one’s with a diffident headline and better content.

  • March 29, 2017 at 4:52 am #1745

    Josh

    Is the FBI still committed to telling some big lie/story about what it’s been up to in this area with all the people in resources? Not sure.

  • March 29, 2017 at 5:21 am #1746

    Josh

    Either way, I have to win the EMF war first (or appear to be some kind of imminent threat to make publicity of record, however that would come about…) I’m not intending to procrastinate on the EMF war. I just have to manage it properly, in order to not make things worse.

  • March 29, 2017 at 8:22 am #1747

    Josh

    I don’t see much CIA or FBI love for @rightsforgirls

    • March 29, 2017 at 8:24 am #1748

      Josh

      How much of a coincidence can it be that this one organization is not edited? Of course it’s not the *only* one…

  • March 29, 2017 at 9:33 am #1749

    Josh

    A is Best Wanderlust.

  • March 29, 2017 at 9:03 pm #1757

    Josh

    That Buddha is the fireplace is a nice piece of conceptual art. But in a real living space, they should have made it a lot smaller than the size it appears to be in the picture (the conceptual fireplace and the Buddha in it)

  • March 29, 2017 at 9:30 pm #1758

    Josh

    I’m trying to get a sense of what the writers feel actually feel about the anti-Trump branding of most media content going on at the moment: “Read about the horrors of WWII – and imagine how Hitler could have been worse with Trump’s money and networking personality…” and similar current events.

    • March 29, 2017 at 9:58 pm #1759

      Josh

      Suppose, as a speculative idea, that it’s like this: The new “domestic propaganda is unleashed” law changes – active for the first time in a Presidential race in 2016 – are implemented in part by AI/NLP software that reads pre-submitted articles for content and then gives the corrupt exec editors running the MSM outlets a score. Perhaps there is a financial prize for articles with a good score and an ominous warning about potential investigations for articles with a bad score. The Deep State/CIA was against Trump, so they give good scores to everything with an anti-Trump theme dragged in. Having learned that over 2016, the news editors kept going with it after the election and now they asking for mostly that kind of story from their writers. They present it as an editorial decision, resistance, blah, blah (rather than the truth that they are just vapid, slavish buttholes doing Spooks work). Is this wild idea possible?

      • March 29, 2017 at 10:05 pm #1760

        Josh

        If it was true, then these things would also be true:
        1) Spook can have huge influence on these outlets with limited profit margin and budgets for amounts of money that are not a lot to Spook or Spook capitalist donors
        2) MSM could say “Spook doesn’t tell us what to write” in some very literal sense.
        3) MSM could say “Spook doesn’t prevent us from writing what we want” in some very literal sense.
        4) None of the reporters see. Only the Exec editor sees, or at least that’s possible.

  • March 29, 2017 at 10:20 pm #1761

    Josh

    I’m pretty sure that GW Bush came to understand the reality of people pulling strings behind him and doing it in some sinister ways. One can imagine him, with his context and intellect, sitting through the Trump inaugural speech and thinking “There is something really weird going on here. Either the string pullers are actually going totalitarian frontal or they are already working against this puppet from day 1”. So I guess his words/reaction were genuine.

  • March 30, 2017 at 6:12 am #1766

    Josh

    I run out of time and feeling good every day, but I try to do things that feel like moving forward, in any case. I’m optimistic that it will get better eventually. The exact flavor of what’s going on goes in cycles.

  • April 29, 2017 at 2:14 pm #2549

    Josh

    Manchester schools…

  • April 29, 2017 at 2:20 pm #2550

    Josh

    There will always be a lot of things we wish were different. That’s true for everyone. I wish that u were able to be completely yourself and free in the time that felt to me like us meeting for the first time. But I know that’s just one more thing on the regret pile of life…Focus on what matters most.

    Other people, not in our life, we never know as well.

    I like U in my life.

  • April 30, 2017 at 12:58 pm #2573

    Josh

    Let’s try to stay positive. Big picture for us is not going badly except for the impossible odds…other than that, we are doing okay. What is unsettling to u today?

    I note, in passing, that Emma was not pushed towards me in Fall 2013.

  • April 30, 2017 at 1:12 pm #2574

    Josh

    The most significant angle on the story Greg Palast is covering is about large numbers of people being secretly purged from voters roles by some black box algorithm that will make mistakes. That is a sure recipe for abuse.

  • April 30, 2017 at 1:29 pm #2575

    Josh

    What was a good sacrifice not accepted? Do u have any ideas in mind?

    • April 30, 2017 at 1:37 pm #2576

      Josh

      I just wondered what u thought. I see lots of things I would have done different from my entire life, but I don’t feel that reluctance to sacrifice was ever my issue.

  • April 30, 2017 at 4:28 pm #2578

    Josh

    I was getting my most essential shoppings things done while Riley was here today. Also, it was raining and I went to bed at 4;30am or so.

  • April 30, 2017 at 5:15 pm #2580

    Josh

    Hop on the bus, Gus. Make a little plan Stan…not that many stations, but it might keep them for a bit.

  • April 30, 2017 at 5:32 pm #2581

    Josh

    Capturing your reality as a blur of motion.

  • April 30, 2017 at 5:35 pm #2582

    Josh

    This man is a flaming politidian?

  • April 30, 2017 at 7:08 pm #2583

    Josh

    Is Anna going tell me a nice, quality story?

    http://www.chessgames.com/perl/kibitzing?kid=T89660&reply=409

    • April 30, 2017 at 7:16 pm #2584

      Josh

      One little piece of that us, today, is the same as me saying, a long time back, that I wanted to be next to u and we could talk about anything. I understand u a lot better now, so I can make a joke about that too. That’s u & u & u.

      • April 30, 2017 at 7:42 pm #2585

        Josh

        I pay close attention, especially Anna…so I tend to notice the most important details. In truth, we always want to be doing something new, in life, each day. That makes the bestest stories.

  • May 1, 2017 at 6:34 am #2592

    Josh

    I do try to keep u posted about everything important that’s going on with me. The EMF struggle has been boring, but constantly the biggest fight for 3+ years. When they come up with something new, it hurts me. Discovering the surprising effectiveness of polyurethane on oscillating flux was a key plus for me, that is still playing out. I’m going to catch some Zzz, get up, and stomp out some more flux. Getting rid of my excess plastic is now another problem, though one that is straightforward and simple.

  • May 1, 2017 at 12:17 pm #2593

    Josh

    This was part of an amazing setup for the locals to tell me that they plan to burn my house down. These men have skillz…

  • May 1, 2017 at 12:35 pm #2594

    Josh

    For me, the rational and feel good play is to focus on maximizing chances for freedom and helping people in the ways I can whether or not that is possible. I always want us to be trying our best, with fewest harmful distractions, feeling super positive about the future, and then, hopefully, dealing with the future when it happens. It’s not best for us to get caught up in negative worries about how that incredible victory could first go right. How can we all remember to do the things we can do today?

  • May 1, 2017 at 12:40 pm #2595

    Josh

    In some of your relationships, u need to be able to think like a parent some of the time in order to have it go the way u want it to.

    • May 1, 2017 at 12:44 pm #2596

      Josh

      I mean individually…u have a friendship…do u need to think like a parent, focusing first on what the other person wants or needs some of the time. Depends on what u want from that interaction. But the answer may be “yes” more often than u think.

  • May 1, 2017 at 1:36 pm #2597

    Josh

    I don’t share their sense of humor. I am not worthy.

    “Unsavory programs veiled in the fear an outsider will somehow insidiously influence the very core of our American spirit are not easily swallowed by a populace weary of broken promises from a succession of presidents — Loyalty Day simply deflects from those failings while also usurping a holiday celebrating a traditionally oppressed class of citizens.”

    Read more at http://thefreethoughtproject.com/trump-declares-loyalty-day-obey/#51Yr247uj2kbcRYF.99

    • May 1, 2017 at 1:40 pm #2598

      Josh

      I hope this example will help u to see what I see, and how it feels to me.

      • May 1, 2017 at 1:46 pm #2599

        Josh

        I don’t know if that was really a woman or a man imitating a woman, but I’m pretty sure they were not trying to do a good job editing there. So that’s one tell.

        • May 1, 2017 at 2:24 pm #2600

          Josh

          The organized criminals running the CIA/FBI try hard to find some way to get their enemies to wind up serving them and achieving nothing. For them, that is the sweetest form of victory, so they will spend some extra money and resources trying to make it happen. It’s helpful to see how they actually operate. Whatever is opposite of honesty, sincerity, goodness, kindness, integrity, etc. is what they are. People call them satanists, which is confusing because they don’t believe in any supernatural things. But they do enjoy being evil in the way that most of the world understands the concept.

  • May 1, 2017 at 2:31 pm #2601

    Josh

    I never complain about helping u feel better about anything that bothers u. I try to get together with u about what is constructive. I feel its constructive to see friends as people u love who wish u well. If they don’t want the same things or they have some conflicting desires for the future, that doesn’t have to be crushing. U desire a supportive friendship & its right to think about that as a give & take. That doesn’t mean u give things that are painful to give. U give other things that are not painful.

    • May 1, 2017 at 3:58 pm #2602

      Josh

      If I have a toy, or a tool, or some other thing like that…I can expect it to do what it is designed to do, be still when I put it away, and then perform when I take it off the shelf. People are not like that. U haven’t given me a sense of a people relationship that works for u there, but u give me the sense that having one is important to u. My efforts to help u bridge that gap have not be successful to date.

  • May 1, 2017 at 4:12 pm #2603

    Josh

    There are a group of in men who have nothing else to live for and that is why they are there as shock troops. But they are not a force majority of the country. The bulk of the military/police etc. works under a cloud of deception. We work to undermine the deceptions in a way that makes them apparent for even deniers to see.

    • May 1, 2017 at 4:35 pm #2604

      Josh

      We’ve seen lots of examples now of how hard CIA & FBI fight to keep control of media outlets that will block any truths about reality that they don’t want the public to recognize. It’s a hard fight. Individual journalists on the inside don’t get to say what gets published. The CIA/FBI work hard to silence everything on the outside. Your slave labor helps keep their tools running, and running at competitive advantage. But I’m sure they would keep fighting no matter.

      The reason why the butt men feel like they have nothing else to live for is not really about sex or the amount of resources they take (which is not high). It’s about their need to perpetuate false stories about themselves. They are addicted to bullshit. They feel bad about themselves without a steady diet of absurd bullshit. They don’t need to be critical about the diet. But they need to have it and not truth pumped in. They are not vulnerable to being persuaded to be nice, but they are vulnerable to slowing down and becoming listless when truth seeps in.

  • May 1, 2017 at 6:33 pm #2605

    Josh

    “James? Jesus…Angleton?”

  • May 1, 2017 at 10:47 pm #2607

    Josh

    I was considering writing a book about being a slug who helps u feel pretty, and how I kind of like that a lot…but I couldn’t find a publisher 🙁

  • May 2, 2017 at 3:22 am #2611

    Josh

    I’m going to lay down a bit, think of u, and then deal with stronger flux coming over the South wall – when I was out to say I say they the chopped up the just installed flux/fascia on the South house to change it up – presumably to put in even stronger guns. So I need to try and get some polyurethane up near the roof there.

  • Author
    Posts

You must be logged in to reply to this topic.